To Experience is To Understand

Another Plinky post. That website is a lot of fun.
No offence to anybody but this, as a topic, is asking for some really lame answers. What's something you never believed until you experienced it? Because absolutely anything and everything would be a correct answer people go with their favourites.

Which is fair enough. Its fun to have an excuse to right about how you fell in love (and you can't tell me that isn't the most popular answer going) when you weren't expecting it. Or share your freaky stories about ghosts/shadows/voices/paranormal activities.

Which just makes it all the harder to have a truly unique perspective on the question at hand - and I'm a big fan of unique. But I will endeavour to avoid 'woe is me' tales of heartbreak. Instead I'm going to have my say about military indoctrination.

The military I have to say is a very sly beast indeed. It has, without a doubt, perfected the art of indoctrinating its personnel. Members who have been in a while warn you about it, before you get in, as soon as you are in, after you've been there 6 months. Your response is that you aren't indoctrinated yet - you are exactly the person you were before you joined.

Yeah... Right... Keep telling yourself buddy. Like you didn't have the phone call on day one when you had to explain out every other word out of your mouth to your mother/father/boyfriend/loved one - whoever you were lucky enough to have 5 minutes for.

Like you didn't have to force-ably stop yourself from marching the first time you were out in public after you joined. Or get the insane urge to stop that hippy who just walked past you and take him to the barber for a real haircut.

Suddenly, one day you are talking to one of your old friends from home and you've just had to explain what a drill square is for the 17th time and it hits you. Civvies are morons. There is nothing complicated about a drill square. Hell, you'd rather be marching around it a few times than eating rat pack and playing army (navy doesn't like playing army much). Its at that point you realise just how indoctrinated you are.

From then on you try and play it down. You avoid shaving on weekends. You make a concerted effort not to mention being in the military to people you met. You start buying clothes that wouldn't be allowed in the mess to wear on weekends. And still you slip up. You use that acronym without thinking. You use slang that is just a daily part of your vocabulary. You go out with your mates and keep even 75cm strides.

I never thought it was going to happen to me. When I joined up (and it was only 3 years ago) I figured that you had a choice in the matter. That you could dress like a sailor, talk like a sailor, work like a sailor and somehow not think like a sailor. I thought I'd still be the same me I always was. I'm not. For as long as I live there will always be a part of me which is military.

Quiz Time

Yes I really am already degrading my blog for the fun and enjoyment of a lame lame quiz... Unfortunately these kinds of quizzes are basically an essential part of my personality anyhow. I love sharing the pointless trivia points that they are always asking you. Though I'm well over the more lame ones that simply ask what nicknames you have ever been called... and they ALL ask that one.

1. What curse word do you use the most?
I'm actually not a hundred percent sure... I reserve swearing for when it is actually warranted ie to express exasperation etc... So I don't really think about it... but probably I go straight to the ever polite f word... and if you are american and consider damn a swear word yes i use that a bit too...

2. Do you own an iPod?
no.... I hate that they are the best product around and that most mp3s are just knock-offs of them these days... down with apple... i'm not a fan of the blatant monopoly technique they use.

3. What person do you talk to on the phone the most?
Though in the past few weeks it has probably been my mum it is usually my best friend Steph... Many hours disappear in our conversation... everything from the boyfriends we don't have to whether we tie our shoes right over left or left over right...

4. Do you still remember the first person you kissed?
Hard to remember what has never happened because i am assuming that those awkward double cheek kisses i had once when going out with some of mum's south american friends when i was 10 doesn't count... yes i know and don't rub it in... I am a romantically behind... it suits me better this way anyway

5. Do you remember where you were on 11/9/01?
Ahhh... Unlike so many Australians I have a pretty good answer to this one. I was sitting in my 6th grade english class. I forget what we were doing exactly. What I do remember is my teacher coming in crying with the teacher from next door. We still didn't know what precisely was going on just that something was wrong. By next period we were watching it live on television. Yes I watched the second plane hit live and the first tower fall... After that I think I was in a class where the television was switched off... It didn't matter nobody learnt anymore that day...


6. What was the last movie you watched?
Watched is What a Girl wants... The last movie I watched and FINISHED was Up In The Air... That was depressing the way it ended... It was a very nice ending in its way... well nice isn't the word... justified perhaps... but nevertheless... as a die hard romantic it didn't suit me one bit...

7. Has anyone ever called you lazy?
lazy? generally not... a procrastinator frequently, disorganised and scatter brained on and off... but lazy only when somebody decides to pick on my fairly average fitness levels


8. Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep?
Not the kind of medicine that puts you to sleep. But there are times when I need to use nose spray to sleep. I sleep very badly if i am not breathing through my nose and when stress can render me insomniac-ish it is important that i have all my bases going for me... maybe i should use medication to fall asleep when i'm stressed... i could definitely use some more sleep at the moment

9. Has anyone told you a secret this week?
Things that I would spread around to all and sundry yes but not a secret as such... just the kind of talk between best friends that stays between best friends...

10. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
after the fact that they are indeed male? height ie whether they are taller or shorter than me... i prefer when they are taller than my 5'10"... and then generally and to a lesser extent wait... stick-like average or badly over-weight are my only real categories there...

11. What are you looking forward to?
HOLIDAYS after my uni exams finished... this corresponds to visiting my best friend down in Melbourne and then flying home to QLD... I love that I have a job that means as a uni student I can afford to do that :)

12. Do you own any band t-shirts?
No... nor have I seen many shirts for country bands... I love my music but I don't like dressing like a groupie thanks...

13. What will you be doing in one hour?
SLEEPING (or attempting to... thank you stress)

14. Is anyone in love with you?
I wish... because again i am discounting family and my best friend who love me but would not be considered 'in love' with me

15. Last time you cried?
ummm... wow I am improving there was a time in my life when this would have been sometime in the last week... I'm really not sure now... during my last fitness test i'm pretty sure... they changed the way i had to do push-ups and made my progress look like regression... arseholes


16. Are you on a desktop computer or a laptop?
desktop... I have a laptop... actually technically i have two... my mum has the other one.... but it quite intentionally doesn't have the internet... when i actually need to code for my computer science class i do it on there to avoid distractions...


17. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos?
no I have my ears pierced and thats enough for me... i WOULD like to find my earrings... I took them off for netball and gave them to one of my teammates... and i'm not sure where they are...


18. Would you ever date anyone covered in tattoos?
I could deal with one or two... but I don't like them particularly... and when you say covered I see sleeves... and I think sleeves look terrible...


19. What were you doing before this?
coming home from netball and subsequently noting on my facebook that there was ice on all the cars already and it was only 9.30 at night...

20. When is the last time you slept on the floor?
ummm... the last time it was my best friends turn to have the bed? I don't remember when that would have been though we don't see each other very often... i think January... though it might have been the December visit... I am just going to through in for this one that I slept on my floor rather than my bed by choice for probably 18 months in year 6/7... the bed I had while we lived in the US wasn't particularly comfortable

21. How many hours of sleep do you need to function?
7-8... which is why this is only an illusion of me functioning at the moment and my attention span for study is even worse than usual... i had 4 hours of the worst sleep imaginable last night despite lying in bed for 8 hours...


22. Do you eat breakfast daily?
yes.... i was well trained by mum... i hate missing breakfast... it never ends well...

Addicted. Mills and Boon is my vice.

Slipped, tripped and fell in love? Well no... But I did end up falling into the genre of romance. Which goes hand in hand with my vice which is romance fiction and in particular Mills & Boon.

The first mills and boon I ever read. It was a second hand one (all fans of mills & boon appreciate second hand mills & boon) which I was given by my mother while on holidays in Thailand when I was 14. It was a slow day so she gave me one of the ones she had read already. From then on I was gone.

Well I was probably gone long before then. I had been in love with one or two books before that time that looking back I realise were romance I just hadn't noticed.

Wicked Desire
Now. I read it whenever I can... I ever read it when I can't afford to be spending the time. When I'm not reading it, I'm watching chick flicks, or better yet writing bits and pieces (I'm not a budding author simply bored with an active mills and boon trained imagination).

Why would I consider this a vice? Well apart from being reminded from time to time at church that it is basically equivalent to porn for women. Though I do prefer the old and dusty ones like the one in the picture above which tend to be ridiculously conservative.

Finally, Why would I give it up? I suppose it is like alcoholism (with out the disease association). I can give it up as I have done a couple of times for the benefit of my studies or because I felt bad after church or simply because I found myself feeling a little depressed to be returning to the reality of my life.

But as soon as I try it again. Promising myself that it'll just be one book on a quite Saturday afternoon. It never is... Soon I've spend $10 dollars at the second hand shop (like I said I love the old ones and they come cheap) and lost 2 days in the pages of romance after romance.

Things Not To Do During Exam Week

I am not sure if this a list of things I have been doing for the last week or just a list of things I know are a bad idea without doing them... Probably a combination of the two. What I do know is there are a bunch of things you should never do or attempt to do during exams. Stress does different things to different people but nobody is completely sane for the duration of their exam block.

1. I'll cover the boring bases to start with. Do NOT start any Facebook game things... No Farmville is actually NOT better than it was the last time you played it... It is just a terrible time sucker... Those games suck the very life and soul out of a person... I would know i've played many in my time.
2. While I'm at it DON'T even open facebook... You may tell yourself you are only going on there to update your status... Your not.. You'll be there for half an hour... Once you've read everybody status's and liked everything somebody else has liked you'll just stare at it waiting for somebody else do do something... 
3. Or Facebook stalk all your friends, and even some of their friends, looking at every photo they've ever been tagged in... Which if you are unlucky will translate to every family photo they have ever been in that their mum put on facebook for their 18th birthday... DON'T look... particularly to the latter ones... you end up having that awkward feeling that you know a lot more than your friend would have wanted you to know...
4. Getting away from Facebook - I wish it hadn't taken 3 points but it is one of the biggest procrastination tools of the moment. Don't use google to look for anything other than that which is directly related to your topic. And even that keep it very brief and do NOT click interesting sounding links inside the website you do need to look at.
5. Do NOT visit the room of a person who is much more confident in the topic you are studying for a study session. It SOUNDS like a good plan but it rarely works.. They will either be working on something you have basically cut away in attempt to scrap through or... more likely... they won't be studying nearly as hard as you. The last thing you need is a study buddy who is content to start the question now and go away and play some X-Box before finishing it. It would probably take you just as long to do the problem without stopping for X-Box.
6. Do NOT compare you exam timetable with other people. Or study with those other people... If you are doing different courses yes the timetable is going to be different. Knowing that the BA student down the hall has all of one exam when you doing engineering has 5 doesn't make you feel any better and the more time you spend moaning and groaning about working the less work you are actually doing... Sucks that thats true but nevertheless. I could certainly get an A in moaning and groaning a lot easier than my degree.
7. Do NOT pick up that hobby you had when you were 10 years-old or even better find a new hobby during exam block. I do it every time... Pokemon games suddenly become that much more entertaining during exam periods... And which the computer simulators where it speeds it through the boring parts... definitely addictive... Thats just me but everybody has that hobby... Even if its just reading a book you've 'wanted' to read for months... If you really want to read it... Read it after exams... you have a study holiday then...
8. This is my BIG ONE... DO NOT under any circumstances THINK ABOUT whether or not YOU PICKED THE RIGHT CAREER... Sorry about the capitals but it needed to be said and said loud. No you are not different or special for hating your course during exams... I think if you are liking it at this point you probably need to get your head checked. Yes, Everybody is thinking exactly what you are thinking... maybe that job as a hair dresser/dump truck driver you contemplated playing in the sandpit would be better... I bet the postie never has to do this bullshit... Maybe I should have been an arts student instead... Don't take yourself seriously at this point... Don't make any decisions about your future during or just after exams... If you get your marks back and they indicate you should probably not still be here... THEN you think about the other options.... Otherwise give yourself a break and when exams are a distant memory think about whether or not you are in the right degree/job/etc...

Finally this one I'm not going to number or put on the list... but do NOT start or rediscover a blog during exams... It just promotes procrastination texts like this one... 

How to Write A Mills And Boon Novel

Yes I know it has been a while. I just don't have the time I had last year... Not the constructive brain thoughts (not a good thing but oh well). Ahhh well today I have written something at least. (Apart from my Maths Exam).

This is dedicated to the gigantic cliché that is mills and boon. I know I know there is a lot more to it than that. Nevertheless my dad inspired me to write this sure fire 'recipe' on how to write a mills and boon. If nothing else it makes for a great game to pass the time in the car. And no matter how much you want to say it is so much more complicated than that you can't help but think of stories you've read that sound EXACTLY like this.


Step 1: Name Characters. It is critically important to give your characters slightly out of the ordinary names. No Mills n Boon character is every Bob, Bill or Fred. There are a number of ways to do this:

• Car Makes, Models and Brands. For her. Why call her Jane when you can call her Corolla, Micra, Mazda or Captiva. For him. Everybody knows that Ford, Holden or Cruze could make for a very attractive male lead. Of course I wouldn't really be naming too many characters after the Mazda range... somehow 121 just doesn't have the right ring to it.
• Street & Business Names. Depending on where you are street names might be entirely appropriate for the naming of your characters. I'm not just talking about when you have John St or George Ave. How about Pyrmont or Booth? After all 75% of streets were named after somebody in the first place now weren't they. Of course dad insists that this should be how you get both first and last names... should it be Pyrmont Booth or Booth Pyrmont do you think?
• Natural Features or 'Thing' Names. You look at a street sign and read the miles to destination. I'll call him Miles. You pass over the bridge. Name her River. You go past a pine plantation. Perhaps Timber... Or Timberton (because you can add ton to anything to make it more upperclass). Straightforward enough? Dad thinks so.

Step 2: Next step is they need occupations. This is basic enough. What are the two closest business you can see... But they can't be bus boys or check out chicks (well she can be a check out chick if you want I guess)... If you see a restaurant, he owns an entire chain/ or just one overly successful family one. If it is Bunnings out your window they can be landscapers or architects or something. Of course there are also the basics like law officers, the doctors surgery you can just take as is. It is more my dad's thing but generally his pay packet needs an extra digit or two on hers.

Step 3: Initial hatred/dislike. This can be on the personal level, the career level or the hobby level really. Just something that at least one of them feels very passionately about and the disagree about the point. If its the her with the opinion it is entirely acceptable that it be a very minor thing to him. She's trying to save some tree. He is just carrying out the work for some other business... that kind of thing

Step 4: Where they get thrown into constant contact. Uh-oh... Apparently that little thing they were disagreeing about has just become very important. Either than or because of their work they are now being forced into constant contact - generally because she is working for him. This is where the disagreement gets a little fierce. She didn't like his job before but now she hates it, hates him because it is impacting hers or somebody/something which is inside her little world.

Step 5: The fall / the sex. The point where something changes. There is no requirement for the hate to have gone away at this stage... In fact it is most likely hidden just below the surface but the physical attraction is appearing between them. Whether it subtle or a full blown 20 page sex bonanza they are going to show attraction to one another despite what their heads are saying.

Step 6: The break off. The issue from before is back... it never really went away but it has reared its ugly head at this point. There suddenly seems to be no way around it at this point. This is the fight or disagreement which has them moving out (if they moved in that is), leaving down, running away etc. All in all at this point it doesn't look good for our two lovebirds.

Step 7: The fairy god-mother. There is almost always a third party at this point to knock some sense - whether intentional of the person telling them to give the other person a chance for this that or the other reason or accidental by way of information they missed about the previous break off argument. This step has both of them seeing sense generally one through the fairy godmother and the other through self meditation type means but both may have a fairy godmother character.

Step 8: The happily ever after. Whether a short I love you exchange or a complete epilogue of what they'll be doing for the next 10 years of their life it doesn't matter. All that matters is that they are together and will remain so forever. There is never a mills and boon with a sequel. Would be funny if there was though :P